I understand there's just too big a gap between us. I understand that I am not the one. I understand that I'm afraid. I admit that I care too much not to get myself hurt again. But please, don't condemn me for that.
I could see nothing but fear in my own eyes. Too bad I've realized yet too afraid I'm to confess. Now I ask for nothing but guidance that can take me far in my life. Give me some time and I shall be the proud girl I once was again. It has been long. Much longer than it ought to be. Let the fear bury itself and not haunt me again.
Back at home for CNY hols, finally.=) Was looking towards this break very much, especially the weekend a fortnight ago. It has been quite some time since I last felt the impulse to be back at home so strongly. Still yet to figure out why. Maybe the lonesome feel was invading my mind. It's a quaint feeling that I started to enjoy classes really much. To a slight extent of not wanting to be back in room most of the days. Maybe I'd never revel in solitude. Maybe I am that sort of person who get kind of lost when being left alone...
Quite a fair share of work to be done during this one week hols. I've got my MS assignment to do and some other hw assigned by my dear lecturers. And if my fellow ex-collegemates (erm, I do doubt if there is such word. Haha. But I believe I'll be forgiven for such trivial mistake, and you do understand what I mean right~) r curious, I quite enjoy my classes over here. I am really fortunate to have such experienced lecturers, and they r nice to know too. Also much obliged to my fellow classmates who have been showing me such kindness in helping me to adapt to this new environment, although not very well integrated yet.^^
Miss the time I had back in SA, and especially with housemates and jocose classmates. Thinking of the crazy moments we had and dreaming away have become one of of my pastime. Yes, sooner of later, time would slowly erase fractions of the precious memory I have. And I do understand, backward glances' not gonna do me much good now. I am lost. So very lost. I yearn for guidance. And I wish to see myself metamorphose into a matured independent young woman. I ought not to be the impish and ignorant school girl anymore...
Time to sleep now. Gud nite everyone. Sweet dreamz tonight. Oh yeah, and Happy CNY to those celebrating, happy hols to the rest.=)
哭不是错。
是。我承认我是爱哭的。但是哭绝对不是懦弱的象征，更不是低头的的代号。
"Weeping is one of the mechanisms that humans use to get rid of some toxins. Tears may be involved in removing waste products or toxic substances from the body. Perhaps that is why so many people say they feel better after crying."
The chemical components of tears are far more complicated than one would imagine. Li Jin introduced an interesting experiment conducted by American scientists. The scientists first had some volunteers watch a sad movie, and then they collected their tears. Later they had these volunteers cut onions to generate tears. Chemical analysis afterwards showed that the tears collected from cutting onions are very different from those created by watching a sad movie.
Some people may think that crying is just a loss of control and a sign of weakness. But actually, crying is a form of stress release.
...
"When you feel pressure, frustration, sorrow or anger - any negative emotions - you should take effective measures to release them. Stress is terrible for the health of your brain, heart and other organs. Crying is natural, healthy and curative. So don¡¯t wait until your sadness becomes a depressive disorder."
哭是一种疏解压抑情绪的管道。哭是一种人的本能。哭是自我的，放纵的，没有负担的。
哭没有错。重要的是哭过以后依然能重拾属于自己的快乐。重新站起来，重新面对一切。哭不是保护伞也不是方舟。但哭是情感的气垫，让人在面对现实的同时也有能倚赖的支撑点。哭不是解决方案。但哭能让情绪有个缓冲期。哭吧！但哭完之后请记得重拾自我。信念是会永继经营的。
当然，肿得可以的眼睛是必然的代价。^^
最近的自己变得好慵懒。不想理任何东西。不想花心思。中秋节刚刚过了，还没有提到灯笼。第二次不在家过中秋节了，感触已没那么深。还是有些许怀念数年前提着灯笼往公园走的晚上。和家人坐在皎洁的月亮照得到的亭子里吃着其实不特别好吃的月饼，那种简单的美好变得有点遥远了。在家真好...
Alright, i noe u guys r gonna say m biased again, my dear Jekyll n hyde and gossip gal. Still m gonna post it here. Well u guys wldn't expect me to demolish this drawing rite?=) Hope u lyk it, L.^^
Heres the pink dolphin for j-cyn. Modified the shape slightly. Yes, still need more improvements. But m gna leave it lyk this first for the tym being until i can think of wad to do wif it.=T
Contributors
- fran
- A girl living in her platonic world, only willing to realize the splendiferous side of the world.